WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
National Security conscious Australians are today walking a little freer, after some welcome news off the coast of Australia.
After a big week of being scared into thinking our biggest trading partner is going to head 1000s of kilometres down south and invade our sovereign nation for some reason, punters have now learnt that the Chinese warships are no more.
In a shocking blow for China’s military pride, the warships hanging around the Tasman sea have all spontaneously sunk into the ocean.
The sinking comes without a single torpedo or missile being fired in anger, with the Chinese made ships heading to the bottom of the ocean after being used more than once.
“Yeah, it turns out the diesel engines in the ships were all made of plastic,” said a naval expert from Betoota Ponds Inland Navy Base.
“And the hulls were made of even cheaper plastic.”
“When they were used for a second time they broke.”
It’s believed that the ships also don’t have any warranty, in a further blow for the Chinese navy.
The devastating blow follows Aussie media and politicians spending a week stoking fear about the ‘threat of China’ off our coast.
Those stories were spread like wildfire despite China conduct drills in international waters and never once entering Australian or Kiwi waters.
However, they’ve been deflated this afternoon, much to the furry of defence lobbyists in board rooms around the country.
More to come.
