The city of Townsville has confirmed today that the new ‘Minder’ system might not just be implemented with the North Queensland Cowboys.

The Minder policy was announced yesterday by the Cowboys after one of their senior players Scott Bolton pleaded guilty to drunkenly touching a woman’s upper thigh in a Sydney establishment last year.

The coach of the Cowboys Paul Green said that the club would employ minders to keep an eye on the players in social situations in order to attempt to try and avoid one of the issues that has plagued Rugby League for decades.

However, the minder policy might not just stop with elite footballers in the Deep North, with Townsville announcing that they might enforce the policy on the army servicemen in the region.

The Mayor of the city told us this afternoon that serious weight is being given to the suggestion.

“It would be expensive for the Defence Force obviously, but not as expensive as trying to clean up half the shit those boys get up,” the mayor said.

“So if we made it mandatory for the army boys to have minders, just like it’s mandatory for them to have sleeve tattoos and G-Shocks, then maybe it would sort a few things out.”

“But then there’s obviously a chance of them just telling us to get fucked and packing up the base and moving elsewhere and that would leave us in more of a lurch than the goats retirement.”

“So we are just weighing up our options at the moment.”


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