Ex-Prime Minister Tony Abbott has been working hard this week, claiming to have binged all 10 seasons of RuPaul’s Drag Race to see what all the fuss is about.

The chief agitator in the blue tie party and loudest voice during the plebiscite a couple of years ago, Abbott finally took the advice from colleague and South Australian Christopher Pyne and sat down to binge watch the reality competition show, RuPaul’s Drag Race, in an effort to broaden his horizons.

“Pyne asked me who my favourite queen is. I said Elizabeth II,” stated Abbott as the opening credits for season 1 of the popular drag show played.

“Wait, how are they going to drag race in those dresses. Oh, fuck.”

Determined to learn more about the queer community, Abbott persevered through the effortlessly bingeable show eating two entire packets of microwavable popcorn and crying only twice.

“Why do they bring back Ginger Minj for All Stars? She was such a bitch the first time! I mean he was a bitch. He was acting up I mean. I mean, I don’t care this is stupid.”

According to Abbott, it was difficult to watch at some points, citing the time Kathy Griffin was a guest judge and how he recoiled every time there was a joke about female genitalia.

Still not understanding the appeal of the show after season 8, Abbott wore some of his wife’s red lipstick and watched the show slightly dolled-up but was unable to feel even remotely sassed.

“I still don’t get it. Naaap queen.”


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here