ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

South Australian Premier Stephen Marshall has relaunched the state’s tourism drive for the fourth time, telling media in Adelaide today that everybody except Victorians are welcome.

Marshall opened the press conference by jumping out a large crepe paper reproduction of a Farmers Union Iced Coffee.

“Coooome on down to see what all the fuss is about!” he shouted at the socially distant journalists seated before him.

“Hey! Woah! Did somebody say red wine? Well come on down to Coonawarra and McLaren Vale! Drink some red wine that tastes like it’s got salt in it for some reason!”

“Do you like big rocks? Well, you’ll love Wilpena Pound! Hey kiddo, you looka lika you digga some oysters? Mama mia, wella bella comma on outa Ceduna and eat some! Ok, no more jokes!”

“But seriously, we’re open for business now. I’m not doing this song and dance for a fifth time.”

Marshall then climbed back into the crepe paper Farmers Union Iced Coffee and sighed.

More to come.

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