LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
After finally getting around to fulfilling a maintenance request, local rental agent Jmaine Corsair (28) has asked his tenants to confirm they’re cool with the tradie arriving sometime between 7am and 6pm on any old day this week.
Hoping to one day be one of the big boys who gets to sell a house and take his commission, Corsair is still paying his dues managing rental properties.
Due to having his sights on other goals, and that he has to manage 87 different rental properties at once, Corsair couldn’t give too much of a shit what his rental tenants are up to.
Therefore, Corsair didn’t bother getting a narrower time frame to give to his tenants who just lost the function of their last working light bulb socket.
“The electrician can be around between seven and six during one of the days this week,” stated Corsair over a phone call he took so long to make because he had so many Reddit tabs open.
“Or maybe next week, who knows?”
“So can someone be home during that time?”
“I understand. Just as I’m sure you understand that I wasn’t really asking, was I?”
“Otherwise, we have a spare key, we can just give it to him so he can let himself in. Let him have his way with your living space while you’re at your job working hard to pay my client’s mortgage.”
“Oh wait, how silly of me – it’s not your living space is it? In fact, it can never be yours. Not truely.”
“Maybe I’ll let myself in sometime. Why not? I could if I wanted to.”
“But don’t worry, I won’t. I don’t even remember what property we’re talking about, that’s how much you mean to me.”
“God you’re disgusting.”