From ‘Where The Wild Things Are’ to ‘Clifford The Big Red Dog; – there was no shortage of animal-like dress-ups at Melbourne’s South Gangitano Primary School today.

With the theme of ‘Curious Creatures, Wild Minds’, 2020 Book Week was once again aimed at highlighting the importance of reading, in what’s been a challenging year for students and teachers in the back drop of the 6-month-long Melbourne lock down.

Awards were handed out right across the school yard, staff room and school drop off zone – as the hyper-competitive suburban mums went to war in the name of a silk ribbon.

However, in a peculiar turn of events, the school’s all-round best dressed award has been given to the one member of the community who claims to have put in the least effort.

The school’s more than 700 students, and their teachers, ditched uniforms for a creative costume that best nails this year’s theme.

All except for 6A homeroom teacher, Mr Carl Moran (33), who claims he has completely forgotten that the annual literary festival was even taking place.

Sitting on a comically small chair in the middle of his demountable classroom, Mr Moran was complimented all morning on his costume before he was awarded the top prize by a unanimous vote.

Complete with a loopy polyester suit, frazzled hair, and his wife’s make up poorly smeared across his face, the embattled educator says his Joaquin Phoenix get-up is purely coincidental.

“I thought I was getting the sack when they called me into the principal’s office” he says.

“Turns out I was just winning best dressed”

After attempting to home school four kids under 10, and three false starts at recommencing the 2020 school year, Mr Moran is now resonating greatly with The Joker – a fictional comic book character that symbolises the pathological white male fragility.

“Apparently I look like him too!!” he says, as he claps his hands in front of himself like an otter.

“I guess this is the silver lining I needed in for 2020!”


“See I’m a man of simple taste. I like things such as gunpowder…dynamite and…gasoline!” 

He says the 2020 Federal budget may have also contributed to this nervous breakdown, after the Prime Minister made it clear how much value he places on the frontline workers in the Australian school system.

“They need you right now, but when they don’t, they’ll cast you out like a leper!” 




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