ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

A Betoota Heights man has made a dreadful financial decision this week that’s set to haunt him at every monetary crossroads he will come across in the next five years after securing a used Jeep Wrangler Rubicon with an unsecured personal loan.

Despite telling friends and family that he’s “actively looking” to enter the property market, city worker Damien Dudley has gone and vandalised his borrowing power by paying close to $85 000 for a Jeep at 13% interest over 5 years. No deposit and a 40% balloon.

The 35-year-old’s mortgage broker Bill Hare-Dressar said he spat his Fanta Zero out this morning when Damien told him the news.

“He phoned me and explained that we might need to update his application to reflect his recent purchase of a Jeep Wranger Rubicon. I said, ‘Christ, mate. You’ve really crossed the Rubicon into financial ruin doing that. You’ve Rubi-cucked yourself,’ and he just laughed at me,” he said.

“The went on to say he got a loan because he didn’t want to eat into his house deposit. I told him that wouldn’t matter a fuck considering how much bad debt he has now. He’ll be renting or if he’s lucky, leaving his slippers under his childhood bed at his parent’s place. I’ve never seen something so reckless from someone looking to enter the housing ponzi,”

“And for a Jeep. They hold their value like Dell laptop. He’ll have to do an insurance job on it or something.”

But Mr Dudley said he doesn’t regret his decision.

“It’s a great car. Everyone has told me what an idiot I am for getting it but it’s my dream car. Sure, the repayments are 40% of my monthly income. I had to make some fake payslips to get the loan in the first place. I read the Barefoot Investor, he said it’s OK to buy a car if you really love cars. I love this car. Barefoot understands.”

More to come.

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