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“[Haha] His names Tom guys,” said local girlfriend Sarah Simmons at a popular French Quarter rooftop bar yesterday.

The jovial yet firm claim comes as the brand manager at a small boutique firm in the old city district began her campaign to have her boyfriend’s nickname put to bed.

Tom, or the man known as ‘Nugget’ to all of his mates, has recently gone in the deep end with his new squeeze Sarah.

With things getting serious following a move in, and chat of a shared credit card, Sarah has decided to start waging war against her boyfriend’s long-running nickname.

Born out of a drunk trip to Schoolies just after his 18th birthday, the name Nugget has stuck, and while the origin of the name is extremely repulsive, the juvenile nature of the behaviour that brought harm to only himself has ensured that it has survived the test of time.

“Seriously though guys, it’s time to grow up a little bit. It’s time to let Nugget go haha,” said Sarah for the 3rd time this month.

While everyone present nodded and pretended to take the points on board, it’s believed the name won’t be going anywhere anytime soon.

“Fucking no way,” laughed Fingers’ good friend Phil.

“Yeah, it’s not going anywhere,” said another.

“What he did was fucked, and he should never not be reminded of it on a weekly basis,” laughed another.

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