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Departing Adelaide for the Paris of Australia, Dennis Rollins said he loves coming to Melbourne this time of year.

Wife Donna left Fitzroy in the early 90’s to take up a position cutting, trimming and processes hydroponic marijuana plants in a bikie-owned stash house in Tea Tree Gully in Adelaide’s cosmopolitan northeast.

Since marrying in 1995, they’ve alternated between Glenelg where Dennis’ family live – and Fitzroy.

“Sometimes I fantasise getting caught up in one of those famous Melbourne bushfires. I hear the smoke gets you before the flames,” he explained to The Advocate this morning.

“Last year her mother told me I looked like I’ve been in a good paddock…” he says with a the flickers of fire raging in his eyes.

“How about that, a weight crack. In front of my own kids”

“I met my wife buying dope from a bloke with an AK47 tattooed on his throat, then you can guess what her family is like. I lie to her, I lie to the kids. I say I can’t wait to see my brother-in-law Moth. Yeah. His fucking name is Moth. As in one of those big dusty night flies.”

“Her old man owns some sort of revolver he keeps on the table during Christmas lunch. I’d say something, but I know the old bastard isn’t a fan of mine so I don’t want him to grease me before I’m finished downing his dry turkey buff.”

Echoing the sentiments of his brother-in-law, Moth Shriver made it clear to reporters that he’s not too keen on Mr Rollins because of his ‘snooty Adelaide attitude’ and the fact that he tells almost everyone he meets that he’s the descendant of a free settler.

“I’ve shot manlier men than him,” explained Moth. “If he puts Fleetwood Mac on again like he did two years ago to ‘lighten the mood’ then I’ll shoot him too.”

More to come.

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