ELLIE POPOV | Lady Writer | Contact

A self-described communist has reportedly been swooned by a date’s red flag overnight.

Denise McTavish, of Betoota Heights, said she initially felt ‘trepidatious’ about going back to Cameron Speek’s house after an afternoon spent hanging out but felt vindicated upon seeing what hanged above his bed.

“It was a giant red flag,” she said.

“A flag of the USSR. Even though it was hung vertically and back to front, it was refreshing to find someone in a romantic capacity who has the same political opinions as me. I’m a communist, in case you were wondering,”

“He showed me some other red flags, like the Chinese one. The Angolan flag with that badass machete on it. The old North Vietnamese one is dope. If only our flag was the red ensign. That’d be sick.”

Cameron Speek took time out of his busy afternoon of telling people on Twitter that he’s part of the proletariat to speak to our reporter about being a communist in our small but cosmopolitan desert community.

The 21-year-old politics and global relations student said it’s tough but somebody has to be on the workers’ side.

“Oh yea, Denise, she’s a cool chick,’ he said.

“But I think she went to a private school, which makes us incompatible. I did, too. The difference is that I hated it and she seemed to enjoy her time there,”

“This country is full of social media communists, I swear to Karl, man. They’ve never lived a minute under pure communism. They don’t know how beautiful it can be.”

More to come.


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here