In some tragic news out of the Murray Darling basin, a large number of fish have reportedly ‘worried themselves to death’ this week.

In the latest blow to NSW’s ecosystem, a mass fish kill has been spotted at Lake Pamamaroo near Menindee, with the NSW Department of Primary Industries working to confirm the event.

The reports come roughly 9 months after horror fish kills in the Murray Darling basin, where huge numbers of Murray Cod, Silver Perch and many other species were left dead.

While scientists, farmers, activists and experts believe this latest kill (and the ones before it) may have been caused by a range of factors like decreased water levels, not enough oxygen for the fish to survive, and algal blooms, Prime Minister Scott Morrison has moved to assure the public that the fish were actually killed by ‘needless anxiety.’

“Yeah, it’s such a shame about what’s happened. But these poor fish have worried themselves to death about what they perceived as life-threatening changes to the environment,” said the Prime Minister.

“This is what happens when we don’t let fish be fish,” said the PM echoing his comments about Greta Thunberg a few weeks ago.

“All these questions about the Murray Darling Basin Plan, and big players up the basin draining the rivers for their own commercial enterprises is just leftie farmers from the area trying to push their own agendas.”

“Just ask the Nats, they’re out here every few months and they reckon it’s just a dry spell.”

When contacted about the latest kills, Nationals Leader Michael McCormack explained that he can’t make it rain.

“I just wish there was something I could do, but my hands are tied, so I’ll keep praying for rain,” explained the man in charge of the party responsible for the carving up of the basin’s natural resources.

“Anyway, I’ve got a trip scheduled out there in November, so I’ll have a look.”

More to come.


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