ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

One of the nation’s favourite sons will be reprogrammed today to not walk on the pitch when he’s not batting.

Steve Smith, a popular run machine and part-time wrist-spinner, was criticised earlier this week for walking all over the pitch marks left by Indian batsman Rishabh Pant.

Some in the game, most notably English, Indian and Pakistani greats, were quick to call out Smith with a few even calling him a cheat.

“If you think Steve is a cheat, then you can go and get fucked,” said former Cricket Australia CEO James Sutherland.

Mr Sutherland spoke to The Advocate this afternoon from his beach house, where he has his feet up.

“Steve is not a complex individual when it comes to his cricket. He sees the ball, he hits the ball. He was standing on the pitch, visualising what it would’ve been like for Rishabh Pant. Who shouldn’t even have been batting. That whole thing is fucken dodgy if you ask me but whatever,”

“I’ve spoken to Cricket Australia about it today and during the training session today, Steve is going to be reprogrammed to not walk on the pitch when he’s not batting. To my understanding, this whole thing has come about from a bug in the code. It will only take a few minutes to install the patch and we can all get on like nothing happened,”

“Anything else you want to talk about?”

Our reporter indicated there was nothing else and took the opportunity to hang up first.

More to come.


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