RORY SALAZAR | Finance | Contact

The recent Jobs and Skills Summit has blessed Australia’s International students with a great outcome, giving them an extra two years post-study to stay and work under visa changes announced by Education Minister Jason Clare.

“International students are worth billions of dollars to the Australian economy,” Clare said.

“And unlike most Aussies, they are happy to work for poor pay.”

Under the changes, Civil Engineers and other highly skilled graduates will be able to stay for four years, up from two, and before they go back home to manage multimillion-dollar complex projects, they can work shit jobs here making $8 an hour as an Uber Delivery Driver and up to $12 an hour twirling novelty sized signs on the side of the highway for companies like Subway.

International student and Civil Engineer graduate, Arafat Hossain (29), is one graduate very happy about the changes.

“I have applied for so many engineering job in this country but I can’t get a job,” he told the Advocate earlier today.

“I am a qualified Civil Engineer, with great experience back home. But here I can only find work as a dish pig in shitty pizza shop cash in hand. No benefits.”

With success stories like Hossain’s, The Advocate can report the move will encourage more international students to move into permanent migration pathways, with the hope that Australia can secure a long term supply of reliable, energetic and foreign workers whom we can exploit for many years to come.

“Australian’s want to feel secure in the knowledge that they do not have to do the shit jobs anymore, so let’s tap into the amazing resource of our international students and have intelligent young people do the shit jobs, cheaply, for us,” Clare said.

The Education Minister noted that the move will help shore up the skills shortage that has been expanding in the shit jobs sector, which has seen prices of every consumer product available today sky rocket as businesses find themselves unable to source cheap labour willing to break their backs to keep prices down and profits up.

“Aussies love consuming things cheaply, but there’s a cost involved for that to continue. Someone has to work the shit jobs, and it’s not going to be me,” Clare explained.

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