WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT
Minders of the nation’s most beloved politician have today made a welcome announcement.
As Tropical Cyclone Alfred bears down on the Eastern Seaboard, it’s been confirmed that Clive Palmer has been tied down and secured.
The relieving news comes as the hatches get battened down across large parts of the Queensland and Northern NSW Coastline, ahead of the major weather event.
Heavy rainfall and damaging winds are expected across the impacted areas, with people urged to secure their homes and belongings.
Thankfully, that warning has been headed by Gold Coast resident Clive Palmer, who has been strapped in ahead of big Alfy’s gusts.
“Yeah, it was quite the process,” explained one of Palmer’s staffers ahead of the mining and property magnate’s push to make a splash in federal politics.
“He obviously wasn’t too keen to have the straps thrown over him, so we had to wait till he fell asleep.”
“I think he knew the game though, he stayed awake for much longer than normal, making it nearly an hour past his morning nap time.”
“But eventually he dozed off, and we pounced.”
“He’s going to be a punish when he wakes up, but he’s safe and secure for now.”
“And that’s all that counts.”
More to come.
