The National Health Service has confirmed this morning that they are eagerly awaiting another round of gratifying clapping.

Speaking out the front of one of the many inundated hospitals in the United Kingdom a spokesperson for the health system that’s had to cop the brunt of a coronavirus response that’s been mangled worse than a 3 day old bit of roadkill, a Medical Officer spokesperson, said they ‘can’t wait for more clapping.’

This follows the country with over 300,000 confirmed cases and 43,000 deaths, (which takes it to roughly 10% of the world’s reported’ deaths) flocking to the beaches and outdoor areas after experiencing a moderately fucking warm day.

Displaying the sense of entitlement that lead them to try and colonize half the planet, the English have caused the world to look on in shock as they blatantly pissed on all of the tireless work done by health professionals risking their lives.

One notable example was the seaside town of Bournemouth, where authorities announced a ‘major incident’ had occurred when hordes of pasty poms descended on the area.

“Hey, we might have to work around the clock and risk our lives and our families lives to fix the mess that the government and people here have created,” explained the Medical Officer.

“But that’s all worth it for a few minutes of people standing on the street applauding us.”

“We love doing this job, so it’s great to see everyone keeping the good times rolling.”

More to come.


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