LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT

Folk stories of old and advertising agency’s consumer profiles indicate that Australians love to cheer for an underdog. However, it appears this time honoured tradition may have its limits as support for Bill Shorten continues to be as lukewarm and uninspired as the man himself.

From the 1983 America’s Cup victory to Ned Kelly’s last stand at the Glenrowan Inn, Australians love to support an underdog and spend such little time overseas they never learnt it’s more or less a worldwide sentiment.

However, opposition leader Bill Shorten while certainly an underdog, is not receiving the love Australian’s usually reserve for those in his position and is being met with the hostility of a cricket player who can’t catch but has somehow made the Australian team.

Underdogs of Australian folklore are often successful in their endeavours yet despite fulfilling this criteria Bill Shorten is unable to be one tenth as inspiring as Equatorial Guinean Olympic swimmer ‘Eric the Eel’ who took almost two minutes to swim 100 metres 19 years ago.

“Come on, I’m a battler,” stated Shorten, fully suited at a music festival.

“I was the least sporty kid at Xavier College!”

While polls are indicating there is every chance Shorten may end up as Australia’s next Prime Minister by mere default, it has already been decided that it will not be in a loveable Steven Bradbury way but in an awkward and remarkably dodgy Eddie McGuire or Mark Holden manner.

“Like me. Just like me OK. And vote for me. Do it please or I’ll yell.”

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