ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

The Morrison Government’s Special Envoy To The Drought repeatedly entered his credit card details into Qantas’ website this afternoon only for the big red bus company to come back and tell him the card doesn’t work.

Barnaby Joyce has told his superiors that he needs to travel to Japan before the weekend because there’s a small farm field days on that’s showcasing a wide variety of high-tech solutions to the on-going drought around the country.

But in light of recent developments that’s seen Mr Joyce stand accused of using millions of taxpayer dollars to achieve not that much has brought his spendings under scrutiny – and travelling to Japan when the Wallabies happen to be playing would send a bad look.

The Advocate can confirm that a number of very loud f-bombs were dropped on the first floor of The Nationals wing today and that nearly all of them came from Mr Joyce’s office.

Joyce allegedly attempted to buy tickets on his parliamentary iPad before putting the snazzy tablet over his knee and casting the broken bit of tech into a portrait of Ralph Hunt.

Retiring to his office, Joyce fired up the Dell and double-checked the CVC.

“Six!” he yelled.

“Four! Fucking Three!”

Seconds passed.

“Fuuuuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! Fuck you! You fucking Dell piece of shit!”

It’s unclear at this point what happened but apparently colleague David Littleproud was able to defuse the situation by telling him to put it on Gina’s emergency Centurion card in the bottom drawer.

More to come.

Before the Wallabies play the Welsh this weekend, take a minute to listen to last week’s podcast with Drew Mitchell to hear how wrong his predictions were for the first round.

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