ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

Popular Nationals backbencher Barnaby Joyce has spoken of his struggle to live without the desire to white-ant the government at every available moment during Lent today.

As one of Parliament’s most outspoken Catholics, Mr Joyce explained to the media today that each year he gives up something he really enjoys.

Some years are more difficult than others.

“Last year, it was smoked oysters and pizza Shapes,” he laughed.

The Member for New England stood in an alcove of the Nationals’ wing in Parliament House. He stood there enjoying a Log Cabin while he spoke on the condition that nobody films him.

“That was really hard but this year, I don’t know if I’m going to make it! [laughs] You guys know me, I basically live on leadership ambitions these days. I could do with a pay rise. Don’t need to tell you bastards that, either!”

“Tell you something for free, but. I was going to go without my party pies this year but I need the brain fuel it gives me. Nothing like having a bit of a debate up there in the green room and coming back to the office to a plate of deliciously-soggy microwaved party pies and a squeezy pot of smokey barbecue sauce. Tell me I’m wrong. If you haven’t tried that, give it a go and get back to me.”

When asked by a very intelligent reporter from The Guardian if that meant Michael McCormack was safe until the 9th of April, Mr Joyce said he guessed so.

More to come.


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