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While swinging from a hammock out the back of her Californian Bungalow in Murwillumbah, local anti-vaxxer Keely Spiritchild (57) unloads another couple of paragraphs into the secret Facebook group that she spends most of her day moderating.

As NSW records 633 new cases this week, including three transmissions in her out Northern Rivers LGS, Keely says this has gone on too far.

It’s time to fight back, because ‘this government’ is hellbent on controlling us.

For too long ‘the government’ has been oppressing part-time beekeepers like her. Because they know that she’s onto them, and all of these public health orders and free medical supplies are just tools to silence her from spreading the truth.

The fact that Keely doesn’t seem to understand the difference between the Federal Morrison Government and the Berejiklian NSW Government doesn’t seem to impact her confidence in declaring them all puppets for the deep state with conspiracies that are bordering very close to anti-Jewish Nazism.

As one of the many talentless and bored yuppies taking great pleasure in feeling like they are smarter than the entire medical fraternity after watching some shit on YouTube, Keely has vowed to never stop spreading the word of the most far-fetched conspiracy that she ever has latched onto, out of an existential fear that there is no higher power that is secretly in control of the uncertain world she finds herself in after a lifetime of privilege – and his now tormented by the idea of long-term compromises in her comfortable middle class existence that has allowed her to bounce around the east coast of Australia in a Kombi van without any form of full time employment her entire adult life.

It is not yet known what Keely actually qualifies as oppression, and whether or not she’s been looking at what’s going on in Afghanistan right now.

With the Taliban taking control of Kabul and a generation of Afghan women now destined for a lifetime of extreme cruelty and bride trafficking, Australia’s anti-vaxxers remain firm that everything they are going through as part of the government’s response to a pandemic is the worst example of human rights violations ever recored.

The US Air Force are now reporting the discovery of human remains in the landing equipment of their planes that have had to take off with terrified men and women clinging to their wings in the final evacuation efforts – as war lords take the city.

As Australia’s jab roll-out now reaches the stages where the variables of misinformation spread by entitled anti-vaxxers are beginning to affect our chances of ever leaving lockdowns, Keely and the merry gang of privileged freedom fighters are being urged to please take a fucken look around.

Anyone who is even suspected of ever questioning the Taliban are likely to be murdered in the coming months, with bullets, from guns, aimed at them by the people in control of them.

Lebanon has been without power and fuel for weeks now, as the embattled nation struggles to recover from the explosion that destroyed their largest city 12 months.

Palestine remains under siege from increasingly violent land grabs, while in Bangladesh 740,000 Rohingyan refugees remain stateless as they choose the extreme poverty of their neighbouring country over the mass slaughter of the regime currently arresting doctors for reporting on this pamndemic in their homeland.

Comparatively, Keely hasn’t been able to go to a cafe for a week, and the government is strongly recommending she take a free immunisation shot that her local GP can administer to her whenever she has the time.

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