ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

It’s a Catch-22 that popular Victorian columnist Andrew Bolt wished he never found himself in.

As he sat looking at his computer this morning, he pondered the news that tampons and pads will now be made available free of charge to students at Victorian high schools.

It wasn’t fair, he thought.

Why do women and girls get something for free while the boys have to buy their own Lynx and chewy?

But to kick up a fuss over this would mean Andrew, a key conservative figure in this country who’s said some very inappropriate things about women and people of colour, would need to acknowledge the existence of menstruation.

“The very thought of it chills my blood,” he told this masthead this morning.

“Though I don’t like your newspaper, I feel it’s important that people digest news and opinion from a wide range of sources, as long as they’re under the NewsCorp umbrella,”

“But it does riddle me. If I were to shine a light on this inequity in our schools, I’d have to say those words. T-t-t-tamp I can’t bloody say it!”

“What it men got p-p-peeerr God what’s wrong with me!”

Mr Bolt then apologised and hung the phone up.

More to come.


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