ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

Opposition leader Anthony Albanese said he is looking toward the future today at the National Press Club in Canberra, vowing to modernise all facets of government.

“Under a Labor Government, all Commonwealth cars will upgraded to re-birthed Subarus. It will save the taxpayer millions,” he said to great fanfare.

“We will be using re-birth Subarus because everybody knows that makes them faster. Faster from door to door. It will save time an money,”

“Electric cars are just not there yet. They might be later but for now, they’re well within the domain of the rich man.”

Commonwealth cars are used to ferry around our nation’s politicians and their families.

While traditionally up-market Holden saloons, now that no cars are manufactured in Australia, the future of the country’s “Com Car” fleet is now in question.

“Using re-birth Subarus will create jobs here in Australia. Whereas pikelet-nipple Scott will just sell the country down the river to the lowest bidder,” said Albo.

“I’m about secure jobs for Australians. A secure future that’s fair for everyone.”

More to come.


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