ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact

WHETHER YOU WERE AT the game or just watching on TV, whenever former All Black great Richie McCaw entered a ruck or maul the nation would scream: “Just look at the cunt! From the side again!”

Now in retirement, the 35-year-old won’t have to endure tongue-lashing after tongue-lashing when he visits Sydney’s ANZ Stadium for tonight’s Bledisloe Cup match.

They’ve built him his own discreet side entrance so he can come and go as he pleases from the side all day without the fear of being abused.

David Cowan from the ANZ Stadium Trust says it’s a renovation that’s been a long time coming.

“Forcing Richie to enter from the back like everybody else isn’t fair,” he said.

“He’s built a career on entering everything in his life from the side. Rucks, mauls, tackles, helicopters. You name it. His post-playing career shouldn’t be any different, so we’ve built him this special entrance,”

“So I’m asking the Australian people to stop yelling, ‘From the back, you fucking cunt!’ at Richie from now on.”

The softly-spoke South Island ball winner was quick to commend the ANZ Trust for making allowances for him.

He joked with journalists today in Sydney, saying that perhaps they’ll start letting him play Crowded House in the commentary box as well.

“Well blow me down [laughs] nah bro, it’s sweet as!” he said.

“Chur to the ANZ Trust for letting me enter from the side. I’m looking forward to doing it until the day I die. Can’t wait to crack open a tin of L&P and put my feet up on the desk and call the game for Sky bro,”

“We might even tape John Eels to a chair and give him a few noogies and wet willies again.”

LEAVE A REPLY

Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here