In absolutely fucking heartbreaking news out of NRL HQ today, it seems these gotdam coronavirus has finally succeeded in its efforts to take away the last good thing Australia had to look forward to this winter.

The 2020 NRL season has been suspended amid the growing impact of the coronavirus pandemic in Australia, which was an easily solvable issue that could have been knocked on the head months ago if our government had listened to the grave warnings from medical experts, instead of telling us to carry on with life like nothing was happening.

The darling league had desperately fought for its continuation as it explored every possible avenue for survival, with very real fears that the competition could fold after spending their entire rainy day war chest on fireworks and Mackelmore.

However, with today’s announcement that Queensland would be shutting its borders, the game and its three teams from north of the border are going to struggle with the inter-state dance.

It’s with heavy hearts today that the ARL commissioner and game’s CEO have had to announce the indefinite suspension of all remaining fixtures for the NRL season.

However, as the last sporting code to hold onto the dream of a full 2020 season, it is not lost on the public that today’s announcement comes less than 6 hours after every pub in the country was closed by the Federal government.

It seems the NRL board were not as much worried about their organisation’s financial collapse as it was about giving their famously naughty players an 18 month off-season.

With the closure of all bars and nightclubs, the NRL expects the lads to put on a shitload of weight, but at least they won’t be punching on and pissing on themselves in full public view.

Unfortunately for the sportsball culture warriors of Twitter, the suspension of the 2020 NRL season means they will have to find another popular Australian past time to make fun of.


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