In a not so feel-good sporting story out of a safe Labor seat today, young Millie Watts is up against it, it can be confirmed.

The talented young tennis player is currently being forced to deal with sub-standard facilities because her silly mother and most of the other people in the area she lives in vote for the Australian Labor Party or the Greens.

“Mummy said she asked for some money to upgrade our tennis court and it was looking good but apparently we didn’t get anything,” said the young girl after fiddling with the broken tennis net.

“My coach said it would nice to have some better facilities, but I guess until more people vote for Scotty we be able to do much,” said the young prodigy.

“But not too many people because then we would become a safe Liberal or Nats seat and then we wouldn’t get any money either.

This comes as a raft of sporting clubs around the country come to terms with the fact they didn’t get any of the grants they should have because the people in charge of the money were playing political games.

“Oh well, maybe it doesn’t matter too much. I’ll keep trying I guess,” said the young girl trying to be the next Ash Barty.


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