The National Earthquake Alerts Centre has issued an alert this morning, after reports of a 8.5 magnitude quake was recorded on the fringes of Western Sydney.

Unrelated to the movement of tectonic plates, media on the ground are attributing the roar to the rumbling of victory, as Penrith Panthers five-eighth and proud St Marys local, Jarome Luai, leads a victory convoy to the Panthers Leagues club and Bluebet Stadium.

Seated on a brand new, lime green Kawasaki KLX110, locals are reporting Jarome was spotted still wearing his playing shorts and socks over a pair of Adidas slides, after his Grand Final winning performance last night at Accor Stadium

Leading the charge like the ‘Doof Warrior’ led the Freedom Convoy in Mad Max: Fury Road, witnesses say the Greater Western Sydney region is beginning to become clouded with motorbike fumes as Kawasaki and Honda dirt bikes begin to flood the streets.

Local police are on the ground and are providing safe passage to the stadium.

More to come.


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here