WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | Contact

Penrith Panthers and NRL icon Phil ‘Gus’ Gould has confirmed that he’s sent some requests upstairs this morning.

Speaking exclusively with The Advocate, Gus explained that he wasn’t asking any favours from the traditional denominational figures, but in fact, attempting to converse with the ‘Football Gods.’

The Football Gods, often referenced by Gould in commentary are the omnipotent beings who watch over and control the game of Rugby League, responsible for things like a ball taking a rank bounce in front of a full back who is under pressure, or blockbuster matches that come down to the wire.

Gould, who has made a habit of heaping praise upon the Football Gods, even after calling them cruel beings on occasion, explained to us that he has asked them to please spare his beloved Panthers for the next few days.

“Please, hallowed Football Gods who art in heaven, grant mercy upon me and the Panthers organisation until we kick off this weekend,” Gus prayed.

“Please, don’t let any more of our players get caught up in scandals before this season starts.”

“This offseason has been enough for everyone, let it end now and lets get back to letting the boys play.”

Gus then opened a 500mL carton of Oak and poured it on the altar in the Panthers headquarters before kneeling in silence for a few minutes and our reporters left.

More to come.


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