After years of trying their very best to stamp out the cultural traditions of rugby league, the wowser journalists at the Daily Telegraph are today learning that you don’t know what you’ve got until it’s gone.

COVID-19 has officially put an end to Mad Monday, the end of season ritual thats sees professional footballers take part in fancy dress while drinking as much piss as they can and inevitably being photographed by some low dog reporters who plaster the images all over the front pages and social media.

In August, club bosses discussed Mad Monday at a chief executives meeting, where they agreed with the NRL that the traditional end-of-season festivities were out of the question in the current environment of pandemic-related social distancing and delicate political hurdles.

However, this doesn’t mean the players aren’t allowed to party like rockstars on their own time.

In fact, with several clubs emerging from the stringent NRL COVID-bubble overnight, Brisbane and Sydney is now awash with hundreds of footballers who haven’t been in a pub or had a root in close to 6 months.

This is currently a cause of great concern in party hotspots like the Gold Coast and Fortitude Valley.

However, there is no community more on edge right now that Sydney’s Bondi Beach.

Arriving back to his old stomping ground today with nothing more than a backpack and a thirst that could kill ten men, Canterbury-Bankstown Bulldogs prop Dylan Napa appears intent on making up for lost time.

Starting at the iconic Beach Road Hotel, locals say the Maroons executioner was setting a cracking pace.

Local residents have began boarding up local businesses after word spread that he had been joined in the beer garden by former Roosters team mate Victor Radley, who has been out of the bubble for several weeks now with an injury.

Federal MP Dave Sharma has since released a press statement moments ago, assuring locals that there will be several stimulus packages on offer for any businesses that suffer Napa-related damage over the next 24 hours.

The Betoota Advocate reached out to Dylan Napa for comment but were told to just chill out lad and there won’t be any trouble unless someone wants it.



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