EFFIE BATEMAN Lifestyle Contact

Tina the house cat has reached a new level of shitty today after attacking a Chesterfield couch in front of its owner, it’s reported.

The moggy, adopted roughly three years ago from the Betoota RSPCA, was explicitly told multiple times that the couch was off-limits. However, after receiving a scolding for a pot plant-related incident, Tina reportedly made a beeline for the leather couch in what was clearly a sheer act of defiance.

Tina’s owner speaks to our reporter about the incident.

“I never thought animals could enact revenge, but it happened,” says owner Liz.

“She got that really pissed off look in her eye.”

“I actually feel a bit scared of her now.”

Liz says she’d even spotted Tina giving the couch a once over and had warned her multiple times to not try it.

Making sure that her owner was within viewing distance before she did the deed, Tina apparently shredded Liz’s favourite couch whilst maintaining intense, unblinking eye contact. 

“I said don’t you fucking dare.”

“She like, stared me down and then started doing that stretchy paw thing cats do.”

“I can’t even begin to describe the level of hate emanating from her glare.”

“If that’s not saying ‘go fuck yourself’ I don’t know what is.”

More to come.

LEAVE A REPLY

Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here