LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT

Soccer fan George La Polosovicski (32) is “beyond pumped” to see the Socceroos play on Saturday night and currently only has tentative plans to start going for his grandparent’s home country when the Socceroos return to Australia in a week.

Having been a soccer fan his entire life, La Polosovicski states that he takes the sport very seriously, even going as far to call it football.

This comes after a tough loss this morning to the champions of the world France.

“It’s the world sport mate and I can’t wait to cheer on the Socceroos and then whichever team I am distantly related to after they get booted,” said La Polosocski proudly, sweating a little under the heat of the two soccer jerseys he was wearing at once.

Friend of La Polosovicksi, Matt Roberts (31) says he’s jealous of his mate for being able to jump bandwagons with unquestionable ease and says it is somewhat of a societal double standard.

“When I cheer for England people accuse me of being a turncoat! Just because my grandma’s cooking doesn’t take place at 180 decibels and make the entire flightpath smell like vinegar, I’m not allowed to jump ship without question,” complained the neo-coloniser.

“George is so ethnically ambiguous he picks a different team each time! I once saw him cheer for Serbia and Croatia in the same World Cup!”

La Polosovicksi states he is disapointed by Roberts’ comments but cannot wait for whatever team he eventually goes for to smash England.

More to come.

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