ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact
A local Golden Retriever is currently lying on the back patio chewing his own tail with no idea he’s about to send a young family into financial ruin.
The Slater family’s beloved dog, Bluey, is expected to gain access to no fewer than three man-size Easter eggs sometime between Good Friday and Easter Sunday, most likely after someone forgets to zip up the $30 Kmart cooler bag in the boot of their leased Kia Carnival.
Veterinary professionals warn the resulting chocolate binge will spark a chain of events involving vomiting, seizures, and a three-night stay at the Royal Betoota Base Animal Hospital complete with a drip, blood tests, and an apologetic Facebook post.
According to family matriarch Tegan Slater, the vet bill will be “financially devastating.”
“We’ve only just finished paying off the movie projector” she said.
“If that dog eats another thing wrapped in foil, we’ll have to cancel the Noosa trip and probably sell the Quintrex.”
The family’s eldest child, Luca, is expected to be blamed immediately, despite claims he put the eggs way “somewhere.”
Parents has been contacted about emergency assistance, while the family’s mortgage broker has suggested a refinance to cover the cost of the $7 300 weekend trauma.
At time of press, Bluey had disappeared behind the shed and was heard dry heaving violently.
The father, Craig, was reportedly Googling “can a big dog power through three eggs or nah?”
More to come.
