Proof that no one can stay a sad little hungry caterpillar forever, former emo Rob Pritchard (32) has turned out pretty well for a guy who was once the self-styled MySpace Angel of Death.

Having once been really good at making wrist wounds that looked just like the real thing, Pritchard now spends most of his time at work, with his partner or making sure he’s getting enough sleep.

While his emo brethren who continued the lifestyle by either growing into goths or simply not growing, Pritchard now presents himself as a slightly less than fashionable man who broadcasts his issues during agreed upon therapy time.

And yet, even with his jet and peroxide locks many years trimmed, Pritchard insists that he still wears his emo fringe, just on the inside these days.

“How can I not with this epic Paramore comeback happening?” asked Pritchard, rolling up his sleeve a little to show the remnants of his MCR home-job tattoo.

“It’s in my heart and my heart will always have a swept asymmetrical fringe with just the right amount of swish.”

The idea that Pritchard is still an emo on the inside is somewhat of a revelation as the fashion really seemed to be the main appeal to being an emo.

What is left to Pritchard now is music and veneration of mental illness, the latter of which is a lot less fun when you’re an adult and it doesn’t make you feel as special as it used to.

Although Pritchard claims he still regularly listens to the emo music of his youth, he does so on private mode using a playlist called ‘Guilty Pleasures and Dark Fantasies’.

“These days my Raybans are my eyeliner, my cufflinks are my nail polish and my KPIs are my obsession with Hayley Williams.”

Upon leaving Pritchards modest three bedroom house, reporter Louis Burke made a joke about having never heard of closing the Goddamn door which prompted Pritchard to remind us that Panic! At The Disco had other songs and slam the door in our face.

“I’m going to my room!”


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