LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT

A couple’s special anniversary dinner ended up tasting a little bitter today as they were joined in the dining room by a dress-synergised nuclear family who were stopping in for a casual mid-week feed.

Saving up to splurge on a fancy meal is a great activity for couples who want to have a bit of fun but think they might die if they get hungover one more time.

With that logic in mind, Betoota couple Celine (29) and Ignatius Dijon (30) went to local fine dining institution Ballav Naise, an eatery that has received two of The Advocate’s prestigious Chef’s Bags.

After taking a selfie in their finest threads, the couple made their way to Ballav Naise, asked for sparkling water and emotionally adjusted to how they were going out of their way to pay more than was necessary for something in 2023.

Cheersing to nine years together, the taste of the wine turned rancid in their mouth as they noticed a local family dressed in spenno but casual clothes take a seat at a nicer table and hang out on their phones for a bit.

“They took kids here?” asked Celine, wondering if she could ever love a child enough to spend $12 on a kid’s drink.

“They must have packets of money, absolute packets.”

“Even if I was that rich I wouldn’t take my family here, not on a school night. What the fuck?”

“Oh look, they’ve dressed the dad and the kid the same, of fucking course.”

MORE TO COME.

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