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Local demolition expert, Digby Schuster, has tentatively accepted to suss out a new gig at the now defunct South Betoota Ladies College – but he’s not gonna show up if it isn’t worth his time in cash payment, or copper.

While walking through the Queenslander-style stilted single-sex primary school today, Digby asks the boss if he has any idea when they built this piece of shit.

“Mid seventies I believe” says the foreman, Hutchie.

“Oh” says Digby.

“That’s a curveball”

The prominent demo contractor then spends the next 20 minutes poking up the corflute ceiling tiles with a broom and knocking on the plaster walls in each classroom.

“Hmmm. Might be a bit of a job on our hands” he says, indicating that the roof of this building might be full to the brim with James Hardie-era asbestos.

Without specifically saying it, Digby then goes onto explain that if the developers want ‘all the gunk’ in the roof dealt with properly, they can find someone else.

But, if they want it dealt with quickly, then he’s the man for the job. If they’ve got the coin.

“Mate I’m one of two demo guys on this edge of the Simpson desert” he says.

“And there’s a lot of holes in the desert”

“A lot problems can get solved in those holes”

“But we are gonna need a bit of money to dig those holes”

“And I get to keep all of the copper. All of the scraps. If those roof tiles come out tidy then I’m taking them with me too”

Hutchie then invites Digby out to the car park to have a yarn over a cigarette.

 

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