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An investigation into the strange noise recently heard coming from the kitchen has revealed the tragic loss of a bottle of beer Dad left there to quickly cool down while he mowed the lawn.

“It’s looking like a worst case scenario at the moment”, Dad revealed at a press conference attended exclusively by Mum.

“Although the bottle did not break, the lid itself has separated from the bottle, resulting in beer covering several trays of frozen sausages, including the really big tray from Costco.

Whilst most of the beer remains in the bottle, it is likely that this could be regarded as a total loss because after thawing, it will probably not be drinkable due to the loss of millions of bubbles.

Whilst the investigation is continuing, at this stage, it is too early to say whether this afternoon’s events will result in a total freezer defrosting situation or a simple wipe with a cloth, but more information will be provided as soon as it comes to hand.

Although visibly distressed, Mum was unavailable for comment as she was performing an internet search of recipes for beer-battered sausages. 

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