LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
Relationships between parents and their children can become harder to maintain as the children become adults and move out of home.
But for Betoota Heights father of four Con Jocks (57), keeping up to date with his adult kids is as simple as giving them a call just to let them know about all the halfwits he absolutely destroyed on social media today.
Enjoying the lifestyle of a self-employed book keeper, Jocks spends plenty of time at home substantially contributing the 0.1% of social media traffic that is done on a desktop computer.
Although he is usually a pacifist on the 362 dates a year State of Origin isn’t on, Jocks can’t seem to turn down a blue on social media, even when he’s up against someone with a much lower intelligence level than him.
“Did you get the screenshot I sent you?” Jocks after his son, immediately after the general ‘how are you’ crap that prefaces most phone calls.
“What an absolute halfwit ha? It’s amazing that some of these guys can even operate a computer!”
According to Jocks’s adult children, their dad contacts them each at least once a week to give an update on all the ninnies, bitties and complete nincompoops that he has shown the sharpside of an intellectual backhand to on social media.
“Seriously, those Betoota Heights Reverse Garbage and Buy, Swap & Sell groups are gonna be the end of me. I keep trying to add you to it but you musn’t be getting the updates.”
“I can’t believe I share a postcode with some boofhead selling a broken veggie composter for $50. The hide on him to get mad at me for offering $100 when it was obviously a stitch-up, you wouldn’t read about it mate!”
“Here is exactly what happened though…”