LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT

As his nieces and nephews make plans to travel overseas, uncle Tim Mirken (58) has made it clear that overseas travel is a complete waste of money.

According to the retired boxing coach, there is no reason to travel overseas when we already live in a lovely big country with heaps of great places to travel to.

As a caravan owner, uncle Tim has seen a lot of Australia and boasts achievements such as pub crawling the entire country and driving to Tasmania.

With these Bourdainian travel feats in mind, it is easy to see why uncle Tim just does not understand why anyone would want to spend a day in transit to end up somewhere they don’t even have chicken salt.

“I’ve heard the Louvre is massively overrated, especially if you don’t like reading subtitles cause it’s all in French,” stated uncle Tim, who tried European travel once and didn’t like it.

“You want a real museum, Killer Whale Museum down in Eden, now there’s a museum that earns your $15.”

However, it has long been established that one overseas destination is immune from uncle Tim’s scorn; the Indonesian island of Bali.

“Oh yeah, I like Bali, you’re supposed to! I got this shirt from Bali, and these thongs. Actually, I think all my clothes are from Bali, it’s so cheap! Your masseuse can get a massage while giving you a massage, that’s how cheap the labour is.”

“But I tell you this, it’s changed over the years. Lots more tourists now which means it keeps getting better!”

“Little known fact about Bali, it’s actually part of a country called Indonesia. You won’t read that in the guidebooks.”

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