LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT

A manhood-esque transition took place today as most of the employees of a Betoota cabinet making workshop agreed the apprentice has been around long enough to get treated like a proper person.

The apprentice in question is 20 year old Peter Zelheim, who after three years at Emu Joinery Co is now called ‘Pretzel’ affectionately instead of in the usual mocking tone. 

Aside from the marginal nickname upgrade, Pretzel will for the first time be the recipient of a coupla polite chuckles whenever he shares a yarn.

“During his first year we never laughed at his stories because to be honest, underage drinking stories just aren’t that funny anymore,” stated supervisor Mick Donald (44) who has unfortunately learnt firsthand how getting started early can cook your brain.

“Once he did a bit of listening, he figured out what gets us gents going. Doesn’t mean we’d actually laugh at anything the little nutsack would have to say, he’d have to earn that.”

And earn it he did, as last week Pretzel received his first human response to a witty quip his coworkers would allow him to have.

Witness reports state the butt of Pretzel’s joke was the new first year apprentice, who had just told a really raunchy story about a public swimming pool hotdog maker that everyone else on smoko refused to acknowledge with laughter.

“The movie rights available for that one mate?” Pretzel asked the new apprentice sarcastically, earning the first murmurs of laughter he had long fought hard for.

“Hotdog, your name is Hotdog now. How does it feel to tell shit stories, Hotdog?”

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