LOUIS BURKE | Culture | CONTACT
September is an important time for the wedding and Australian football industry alike although the two are yet to share a common interest.
Like all Millennials paying the wedding tax, Landon and Em had to reschedule their special day to spring 2022 after a registry office back-up plan was denied by the Bank of Mum & Dad.
However, with their wedding now clashing with a crucial footy finals game, the happy couple might be the only joyous pair at their celebration.
“What a couple of nongs,” stated South Sydney fan Peter Dodd, who was now considering being the random Souths guy at the wedding in some sort of rebellion.
“At least they are sticking together. All the better that two idiots marry each other rather than go infect normal people.”
Despite reports to the contrary, finals footy is the best time of the year, especially with teams like the Eels and Cowboys finally cracking the prelims so they can let down their fans in a whole new way this year.
“They’ve already rescheduled [their wedding] so many times due to bloody Covid, I’ve been on three bucks dos for fuck’s sake.”
“They better at least have the damn game on in the background. Play it during the father of the groom’s speech, that’s always a dribble fest.”
At the time of writing Landon and Em have confirmed they will not have the game on but will announce the result during the ceremony so that guests do not even have the option to watch it once they get home.
MORE TO COME.