Betoota resident Liam Mitchell has reportedly been keeping an eye out for any suspicious-looking mud piles in the odd chance they could be quicksand.

The eight-year-old had developed the obsession out of nowhere, and was now convinced that running into quicksand was an inevitable part of life.

To prepare for his fate, Lisa says he watched read some Wiki How articles and watched a terrifying nature documentary about ‘people slowly drowning in mud.’

“If you get stuck in quicksand you shouldn’t move,” says Liam, now an expert in that field.

“If you move you’ll get sucked in.”

Lisa’s mum, Sheryl, says that her son’s irrational fear got the point where even venturing onto the playground was off-limits as the patches of drought-stricken grass could easily be a ‘quicksand hole.’

“It got a bit ridiculous,” says Shery.

“He can’t even walk on discoloured asphalt.”

“Try explaining to an eight-year old the basics of physics. Just doesn’t work.”

Unfortunately for Sheryl, Liam’s fear of quicksand was soon replaced with a new fear – the Bermuda Triangle.

“I don’t know what to do,” says a weary Sheryl as she drags a cigarette.

“They must have learnt about in class.”

“He doesn’t even swim in the ocean but even a pool’s off-limits now.”

“What’s next, fucking Sand Sharks?”

More to come.


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