CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
One of Betoota’s most gun second-hand house salesmen has today received some good news about recent developments within his wider social circle.
And is the way with the Australian property market, when an real estate agent has good news, it usually means everyone else has bad news.
Toby Sellsoul (40) has just overheard some good goss from the missus. Looks like some of their friends are getting divorced.
It turns out the idyllic, happily married, couple at the centre of his immediate community are on the rocks.
Toby’s wife is rocked by the news. Nobody saw it coming. Not even he did. And obviously he looks out for these kinds of things.
But ‘The Australian Disease’ of obsessive property speculation is never far from his mind. Especially when people he knows are going through tough times. Regardless of whether he is close to them or not.
Toby probably sees these people two weekends a month, and their kids are all friends. It’s such good news.
They were the perfect young Australian family. And even better for Toby, they owned a four-bedroom house in Betoota’s Flight Path.
According to Toby’s wife, apparently the husband had been cheating on his wife with a flight attendant for over a year.
“How good” says Toby, out of impulse.
“I mean. How did she find out? It’s good she knows now”
But Toby’s initial remarks are his honest thoughts. This is the jackpot. Most of the people in their social circle work as teachers or lawyers. He’s the only real estate agent that any of them knows. And he’s about to nab a sweet, sweet listing in a high-growth area.
As his wife helps coach her betrayed friend through the immediate next steps of changing the locks and breaking the news to the kids, Toby consults ChatGPT for a property profile write-up, which, if all goes to plan, should be getting uploaded with images to Domain or RealEstate.com within the next month.
“Let me know if I can help in anyway” Toby tells his wife.
“Like, with um, moving stuff, or anything like that”
“…. Do you reckon she’d be looking to downsize after this or… Never mind. Lets just focus on the kids for now”
