The billionaire apartheid prodigy Elon Musk has this week once again reminded the world that trust fund baby entrepreneurs are best seen and not heard.

This comes as the 51-year-old South African works tirelessly to undo his rather cool legacy of building driverless cars and sending rockets to Mars, and instead focuses on broadcasting his midlife crisis to the world through an endless series of cringeworthy tweets and soundbites.

After buying the social media cesspool Twitter, Musk has spent the last 5 months giving the world an insight into how little people skills he actually has, as he resorts to populist misinformation and tired meme formats to remain relevant.

While similarly irritating nerds on the internet are still rushing to defend Elon Musk as some sort of an anti-establishment industrialist martyr, the fact that he has now started suspending the Twitter accounts of journalists who report on his mythology through a critical lens only confirms that he has the glass jaw of a little rich boy who has never been hit in the mouth.

It has now become apparent that all of the cool stuff that made him famous was only achieved by throwing money at lab-rat nerds and staying the hell away from all operations.

His most recent attempts to present himself as some sort of free-speech-defending Kanye Lite has been met with guttural sighs from the greater public, who don’t really care about his opinions or his feeble attempts at humour, and would rather just see him return to popping up on stage once a year to introduce a new driverless car or space rocket.

Unfortunately, it seems Musk’s deep desire to be loved by a media class he claims to hate means that the rest of the world are going to have to put up with his half-baked jokes and cryptic conspiracies until he either drives Twitter into the ground, or gets a new girlfriend.


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