CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT
The Coalition is in disarray today, after Opposition Leader Peter Dutton announced a thought bubble policy that nobody in the National Party or the Liberals had been briefed on.
After two years of lambasting Prime Minister Albanese for wasting money on an unsuccesful Indigenous Voice proposal that the Coalition actively campaigned against, Peter Dutton has suddenly revealed that he wants to host another Referendum.
If elected, Peter Dutton will spend $450 million asking Australians whether they are willing to hand politicians unconstrained power to deport criminal dual-citizens.
It is now believed that ‘Temu Trump pulled this announcement from nowhere, in a panicking response to unfavourable poll numbers that were released yesterday.
This new referendum idea allegedly has origins in Dutton’s embattled tenure as the Home Affairs Minister under Scott Morrison, and relates to the constant humiliation he faced by the High Court slapping down his efforts to deport several criminal dual-citizens on ‘character grounds’
In what looks like the wheels falling off Dutton’s 2025 election campaign, several high-ranking Liberal Party figures have since come forward to strongly deny that a Deportation Referendum has ever been Coalition policy.
First it was the former Attorney General, George Brandis, who wrote of Dutton’s knee-jerk as “as mad an idea as I have heard in a long time”.
The current Shadow Attorney General, Michaelia Cash, downplayed it as a “last resort”.
However, Shadow Liberal Treasurer Angus Taylor read the room and did not mince his words. “This is NOT a Coalition policy” he said.
However, it’s the often looked over younger brothers of the Coalition that are most outraged by this brain-snap populism.
In a rare showing of unity amongst factional National Party rivals, a press conference was held earlier today on Parliament lawn.
“We know what Dutton is up to” roared a furious Barnaby Joyce today.
“He thinks I’m the problem with his campaign. He thinks I’m the reason he’s bleeding votes to the teals”
“Well, I’ve got news for you spud. Without the National Party you’d probably have less MPs in Parlaiment than the fucken Teals”
David Littleproud backed up Barnaby Joyce, while echoing the frustrations of Angus Taylor.
“Barnaby’s citizenship drama has been put to bed. He’s a proud Australian. And proud Australians don’t want to live in a world where Peter Dutton can just deport anyone that gets in the way of his political ambition”
“We will join the Labor Party in opposing this bullshit. The only referendum Peter Dutton needs to be worried about is the 2025 election. It will be a referendum on the character of the Liberal Party leader”
