Betoota Grove-based asset manager, Hugo Pyne-Costello (44) has woken up this morning with a bit of a spring in his step.

This comes after learning that Australian public broadcaster are now forced to axe up to 250 jobs and cut programming, as it deals with a budget cuts of $84 million.

This news is music to Hugo’s ears, after spending his entire adult life hate-watching Q&A every Monday night – a programme well-known for highlighting both environmental and societal issues that prove inconvenient to the right-wing political classes.

With investments and an inheritance tied up in water licenses and offshore security contracts, Hugo cannot fucking wait to see these unionised members of the fourth estate kicking a can down the road as they seek employment elsewhere in the middle of COVID-19 pandemic and economic recession.

“Haha. Serves them right. Lefties” he says, as he wipes aioli off his beard after demolishing a 10:55am panini bacon and egg roll.

Like many conservatives who believe anyone who doesn’t make 100k a year in their first year out of school aren’t trying hard enough, Hugo doesn’t necessarily have an issue with the ABC’s content.

It’s more an ideological issue with the concept of the ABC. Hugo despises having to give 4 cents of his yearly income to pay the salaries of public servants who churn out investigative news stories that come across as too anti-corruption centric and too focused on reporting on his unfair birthright advantages that have led to such a charmed life of intergenerational wealth-hoarding.

However, by holding onto this elitist right-wing ideology that the public broadcaster should be completely defunded, Hugo is also arguing against everything he was posting on the internet last week – where he declared that the ABC and Netflix should not have to bow down to political correctness for their brave decision to broadcast blackface sitcoms not even a decade ago.

“This is PC gone mad. Chris Lillie is an icon and the ABC shouldn’t have to bow down to culture wars outrage” he wrote on twitter, last week.

“If we keep going down this path, there will be no Aussie TV shows at all. Everyone is so quick to be offended whenever they see something they don’t like”


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