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A local gyprock and indoor tiling specialist has today confirmed that there is still a few places selling non-orange flavoured Fanta.

Mike (77) fits just about every other stereotype befitted upon Australian tilers, in that he is never not squatting, even during smoko, as well as his generous offerings of cigarettes with no health warnings on the packet.

That, and the fact that he is often seen rotating through different novelty flavours of Fanta soft drink.

Long thought extinct, non-Orange flavoured Fanta still exists in the public conscience on worksites around the country – either as empty cans in skip bins or as part of the packed lunch that arrives at work with Vietnamese and Chinese tilers.

In fact the only stereotype-free anomaly that Mike has brought with him onsite today is the fact that he has stopped working long enough for people to notice what he’s having for lunch.

After ten minutes, he quickly returns to his jam-packed Suzuki Swift work vehicle and unloads a new batch industrial-strength chemicals, without any form of personal protective equipment or any acknowledgment of state-mandated occupational health and safety standards.

One local carpentry apprentice has vocalised his concerns that the tilers look like they’ll have finished the kitchen floor before he has even hung any of the doors.

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