In bad news for Labor’s election campaign, Shadow Minister for Home Affairs Kristina Keneally has tested positive for COVID-19.

Ms Keneally shared the news on social media yesterday saying she “woke up feeling rotten” and will be out of action for the next week, while she isolates at HOME in LIVERPOOL which is where she LIVES.

Prior to becoming infected, the recently parachuted Labor candidate for Fowler has reportedly been immersing herself in the local community, which is no longer just some shithole westie suburb but in fact, her HOMETOWN because that is WHERE SHE LIVES NOW, because she is their LOCAL MEMBER.

Keneally’s ambition to move into the highly multicultural seat of Fowler initially angered large factions within the ALP, including the outgoing Labor MP, Chris Hayes – especially when it was revealed her selection would sideline Labor’s grassroots community candidate Tu Le.

Tu Le is a local success story as the lawyer daughter of Vietnamese refugees who have lived in Cabramatta since they arrived in Australia – However, Labor powerbrokers defend their decision to keep constantly shortballing Keneally every opportunity she requests in her efforts to eventually become Prime Minister.

With address at the time was registered as ‘Scotland Island’ in the Pittwater Estuary, with detractors complaining that the former NSW Premier would struggle to communicate with voters who have lived such culturally and economically different lives to hers.

However, this storm in a teacup was finally put to bed yesterday, after Keneally proved that she is now well and truly a westie, after catching COVID-19 while working long hours to provide for her family in an area with less than impressive medical services.

Keneally went on to thank the no-socks-and-chino Young Labor crowd from Sydney Uni, who will now be out there talking to voters on her behalf, while she isolates at HOME.

“A big thank you to the ALP Fowler volunteers for campaigning without me at train stations this morning – very grateful”


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