FRANKIE DeGROOT | Local News | Contact

Embattled Victorian Premier Daniel Andrews has been hit by another scandal this week, after being linked to the 1989 Exxon Valdez Oil Spill disaster.

Andrews has faced intense criticism for his handling of the COVID-19 outbreak such as allowing a BLM march to be held in the city centre, and neglecting to fit the notorious hotel quarantine security guards with chastity belts. 

The Exxon Valdez Oil Spill occurred on March 24th, 1989, when the ship, which coincidentally was also called Exxon Valdez, ran aground on Prince William Sound, off the coast of Alaska.

The resulting oil slick devastated the local environment but provided hours of billable hours for thousands of lawyers, which is nice. 

In an e-mailed statement, Andrews, who claims to have been in Year 12 at a Catholic College in Wangaratta at the time of the oil spill, says he had nothing to with the ecological disaster unfolding approximately 12,350kms away.

However, investigators conclude that there is no evidence to suggest that Andrews was not directly involved somehow, and even if there was, there is no proof that the Premier condemned the disaster at the time, thereby covertly supporting the deaths of up to 250,000 birds and hundreds of fish and otters.

To date, the Victorian Premier has not been able to show that he did anything to stop the disaster, or help in the cleanup operation despite being alive at the time.  

After the disaster the Exxon Valdez was renamed 6 times and eventually broken up for scrap in 2012, moves which were presumably made to distance the ship from Andrews. 

When contacted for comment on rumours that Andrews drives a car powered by petrol refined from oil just like the oil carried by the Exxon Valdez, a clear conflict of interest, a spokesperson for the Premier’s office said they had “no comment”, a phrase often used by guilty people who have been caught red-handed. 

More to come. 

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