The Nation

Baird Calls For Better Transport Options As Bridge Tournament Closes Down Kings Cross

4 September, 2016 13:10 CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT For the first time in his premiership, Mike Baird has admitted that there might be other factors involved in the anti-social behaviour that can occur when 10,000 people walk on the same street in an evening. That is, outside the consumption of alcohol and being young. The Premier has today called for better late night transport...

Man Pops Into Local Travel Agent Like It’s 1999

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Despite learning how to read and send emails, local bridge and wharf carpenter Lindsay Scoles considers booking international travel online a bridge too far. The 27-year-old is as computer literate as most pensioners and orangutangs are nowadays, but the thought of parting with his hard-earned money through the information superhighway fills him with pangs of anxiety...

Critically Endangered Redfern Junkie Spotted Near Trendy Japanese-Inspired Gastropub

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A NEW GROUP of critically endangered drug addicts have been spotted close to a trendy new Japanese-inspired gastropub, in Sydney's Inner South. Before being shooed away by a 19-year-old bartender who grew up in the Hills District and now sings girls Mac Demarco songs in his shared bedroom on the top floor of a Surry...

QLD Greengrocers To Commence The Sale Of Milton Mangoes This Summer

1 September 2016 MERV HARRIS | Brisbane| Contact In a move that was described as a ‘game changer’ by the fruit and vegetable association Fresh Markets Australia, it was announced this morning that independent fruit shops around the country will begin selling the famous Milton Mango, as of later this month. It was widely speculated in horticulture circles that the contract to sell...

Local sociopath to run half marathon for himself, not charity

1 September, 2016. 12:34 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact WHEN YOUNG PROFESSIONAL MEN plan to do something unnecessarily physical, it's usually in the name of charity. Some do the Tough Mudder for the Cancer Council, others run for miles without stopping for the Royal Flying Doctor. But for Brett Lystin, he's running the upcoming Blackmore's Half Marathon for himself - and nobody else. "I can't...

Local ugly person makes social media display pictures them as a baby

31 August, 2015 11:30 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact IN WHAT'S BEING INTERPRETED as a thinly veiled attempt to deflect some of the self-loathing Nathan Truman has for himself, the 27-year-old petrol station attendant has made his various display pictures across his social media accounts images of him as a baby. "Look man, I'm just working with what I've got," he said. "Everybody loves babies....

‘Blackface isn’t THAT racist,’ says man who shouts at his wife in public

29 August, 2016. 14:34 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact WHETHER SHE'S ALLEGEDLY LOOKING TO rekindle a high school romance or spent just a little too much on the credit card this month, Ally Greenport is frequently the target of her husband's short temper. Despite his potentially harmful shortcomings, Mark Greenport has lashed out today at what he calls the 'P.C. Brigade' by...

“After Living In Byron For 6 Months, You Really Get Sick Of These Blow-Ins”

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT After living in the alternative, eco-friendly beach town of Byron Bay for just over 6 months, Kiara Godfrey (29) says she's starting to understand the subtle undertow of anti-tourist sentiment across the district. "They just don't get it," she says. "Byron Bay isn't just a holiday. It's a lifestyle, a state of mind," Kiara is one of the many expatriated city...

Turnbull urges Labor stop being ‘gay c*nts’ and help him pass same-sex marriage plebiscite

28 August, 2016. 14:34 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact THE PRIME MINITER HAS CALLED on Opposition leader Bill Shorten to stop being such a difficult c--t and help him get the controversial same-sex marriage plebiscite through parliament this week. Speaking today from the National Press Club bar, Malcolm Turnbull has hinted that the Labor Party has been deliberately obtuse with him...

New Caboolture mother can’t decide which make of European car to name her daughter after

28 August, 2016. 14:34 ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact NAMING A CHILD THAT'S GOING to grow up on the fringe of Brisbane is a serious business. The spelling has to be unique enough to justify the father having it tattooed above his left nipple in Old English font - and the registrar needs to ask you three times if they'd spelt...

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