The Nation

Study Finds Canned Wine Has Similar Effect On The Brain That Magnets Have On VHS Tapes

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Youngsters sitting on the banks of the Diamantina River in downtown Betoota this afternoon are enjoying a wide range of activities. Some are playing ping pong on the concrete table tennis tables built by the council late last year. Others are crowded around a chess...

“It’s On Page 488 Of The Constitution,” Says Anti-Masker Who Hasn’t Read The Constitution

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact For some reason, the family-owned Mitre 10 on Greenbaur Road in Betoota Heights is making customers wear masks from today - making it the only business in the wider local community to do so. Facemasks are being made available free of charge upon entry and...

Queenslander Enters Terrifying Parallel Universe Where He Feels Bad For People In Victoria

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A Lake Betoota sexagenarian woke this morning in a different universe he went to sleep in last night. After weeks of being largely indifferent to the Victorian second wave of coronavirus, semi-retired builder Michael Brady said he's being confronted by new feelings of empathy with...

Sydney Real Estate Agents In Lockdown After Clusters At The Apollo, Yacht Club, Fitness First

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT In a first for COVID-19 contact tracing, it seems the virus is now targeting certain occupations in New South Wales. Initially the virus was seen to only be an issue for affluent holidayers and businesspeople coming back from China, Italy and the US - before it took hold of...

Andrew Bolt Torn Between Making A Fuss Over Free Tampons And Pads In Victorian Schools And Admitting Women Have Periods

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact It's a Catch-22 that popular Victorian columnist Andrew Bolt wished he never found himself in. As he sat looking at his computer this morning, he pondered the news that tampons and pads will now be made available free of charge to students at Victorian high...

Bloke Who’d Get Rolled By Coronavirus In 30 Seconds Fighting To Expose Whole State To It

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Doctors at Royal Betoota Base Hospital have confirmed that mining magnate Clive Palmer "would get rolled by coronavirus in 30 seconds or less", which has left many in our nation's West wondering why he's fighting to open the borders. Mr Palmer's challenge to the border...

Kings Cross Now Regretting The Distasteful COVID-19 Fountain After Outbreak In Potts Point

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT Karma appears to be catching up with the bohemian artistic community of Sydney's Kings Cross, after a number of restaurants voluntarily shut their doors amid concerns the inner eastern suburb could be the next NSW coronavirus hotspot. Both Kings Cross and the greater Potts Point locality have been put...

Mediocre Burger Chain Announces Expansion Into The Land Of Mediocre Burgers

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A mediocre hamburger chain from America has announced they're expanding into Australia, the spiritual home of the mediocre burger. Australia has long been considered by many in the international hamburger community to be the land of the mediocre burger, which lead to Five Guys...

Wamberal Beach Hosts Latest Retelling Of The Parable Of The Wise And The Foolish Boomers

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The Parable of the Wise and the Foolish Boomers is a parable of Jesus appearing in the Gospel of Matthew and Luke. It is interpreted by some as a story that illustrates the importance of building one's life on obedience to the teachings and example...

Bunnings Staff Induction To Now Include Crash Course On ‘1948 Charter Of Human Rights’

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT In a real sign of the times, the large retailer Bunnings Warehouse is this week updating its training module to include a detailed section on '1948 Charter Of Human Rights.' The new implementation of the complicated legal module follows the recent arguments with the Melbourne Karens about various 'points...

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