The Nation

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A Betoota Heights man who confided in friends earlier today that he was feeling a bit down about the state of our nation has tuned into the cricket in an effort to cheer himself up tonight. However, things didn't go according to Ben Jeangene's plan. "God fucking damn it, Big Show," he sighed as his 15-year-old...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact For a number of years, Greg Roink's friends used to laugh at him. They used to say he wasn't a real policeman because he worked for the Australian Federal Police - and to a certain point, they were right. The 27-year-old bigfella worked as part of the Betoota Grove Consulate District protection detail; meaning Roink would...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Sky News Australia released a statement to the media this morning announcing a new dedicated Newspeak channel for doubleplusgood Foxtel subscribers. The channel, which goes to air later this year, is set to cater for the increasing number of everyday Australians who remained unconcerned about the decreasing press freedoms in this country and the government...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The Prime Minister has spoken to the media in London this afternoon local time where he addressed ongoing concerns about the recent AFP raids on the ABC and News Corp. Scott Morrison laughed like someone's dad then smiled to himself like your likeable neighbour. "How good is keeping the bastards honest?" he said. "How good is keeping...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The Australian Federal Police have raided The Advocate's Daroo Street newsroom this morning over possible leaks related to the infamous 1997 Engadine McDonalds incident involving the Prime Minister Scott Morrison. In the lead up to this year's election, our editorial team published a number of articles related the alleged pant shitting controversy after receiving a...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The day after lowering interest rates to kick start the economy and help the nation's underclass buy their first home, Liberal Party leaders ScoMo and JosFryd have announced this morning that much of the discontent young people have with their Party should be focused on the real enemy - the boomers. In Canberra today, both...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The boatloads of prospective property investors that've just rolled into Sydney have been put on notice by their commanding officers this afternoon to go easy on the Hogspitality if they want to keep their social credit score in the green. Should a visiting Chinese sailor be caught enjoying a fine steak, famous curly fries and...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The Bank Of Mum & Dad announced this afternoon that they will be passing on the full interest rate decrease to their client offspring so they can still enjoy a well-earned break later this year. While it was almost a given that the Reserve Bank was going to lower interest rates, Treasurer Josh Frydenberg said...

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT 24-hour gyms around Australia and the world have been humbled this week, following a large spike in big beautiful boys who have realised they are perfect just the way they are. This comes as world boxing was rocked by Britain’s Anthony Joshuabeing put on his arse by America's Andy Ruiz Jnr in front of a packed crowd at Madison...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A pub in our town's closest capital city has dusted off their smallest television in the least trafficked part of their establishment today in anticipation for the State of Origin. Douglas Pooley, the publican at the Free-Settler Autofellatio Inn in Adelaide's leafy inner city, said that he tries to accomodate ex-pats from other state's on...