The Nation

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact One thing Dennis Pooley is famous for is turning a two-hour pub quiz into a three-hour one. He pads out the space between the questions with useless, directionless anecdotes about his week he finds humorous. The 25-year-old theatre student also yells into the microphone randomly which scares the shit out of everyone there. "It creates a...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Columnist and television presenter Andrew Bolt has reaffirmed his position as the sussest possible cunt in Australia media this week after making some largely inappropriate comments about the St Kevin's College controversy. Bolt, who has a proven track record of defending the acts of pedophiles, explained that this particular child predator associated with the Melbourne...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact Post-Brexit talks have stalled between Scott Morrison and UK Prime Minister Boris Johnson today after an offer from our northern hemisphere cousins went unclaimed. Mr Johnson explained to Scott, who has previously worked in marketing, that he has a new problem that he hoped Australia would be able to help him with. Speaking exclusively to The...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT The under-fire St Kevins School in Melbourne has received some offers of assistance this afternoon it can be confirmed. Following revelations that the school covered up and backed an athletics coach who was grooming a student, former Prime Ministers Tony Abbott and John Howard have made their way down to the leafy suburb of Toorak to help the...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The Overell Street Bridge is set to be replaced next year prompting an outpouring of grief from the community over fears it may never get the chance to host a thrilling conclusion to a car chase. Built during the spring of 1929, the drawbridge that spans the mighty Diamantina was once the pride of our...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact The local community has been left reeling today as a nationwide retailer with a fantastic reputation has been caught paying their staff the correct wage on their first attempt. Colon Power, home of all things electronic around the nation, came under investigation earlier this year from FairWork after being tipped off by a number of...

ERROL PARKER | Editor-at-large | Contact A Betoota Heights man who drives a 2002 Holden Cruze has told reporters and friends this morning that he's abandoning his original plans to sell it after the carmaker ceased operations earlier this week. Holden's parent company, General Motors, decided to pull out of the Australian market after conceding it's not viable moving forward. That's after...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT While the nation continues to reel from the news that iconic car brand Holden will be no more, the Government has wasted little time setting the record straight on who is to blame. Despite the fact many have criticised successive federal governments for abandoning the once-great Australian automotive industry, the current Government in charge has hit out at...

FRANKIE DeGROOT | News | CONTACT From the foyer with its seashell-embedded terrazzo floor to the framed picture of the Pope overseeing the personnel at the sign-in desk; from the oversized light fixtures to the prominent ‘Catholic’ part of its name, it would be easy to forget you are not in some sort of futuristic cathedral; if it wasn’t for the constant jangling background...

WENDELL HUSSEY | Cadet | CONTACT As the nation comes to terms with the news that the iconic car brand Holden will close be closing down from 2021, social media giant Facebook has moved to soften the blow. Facebook has announced that it's introducing a special Holden themed filter for shared accounts in the wake of the news that General Motors will discontinue the...